John D. Fuckbody

HEY SUCKAZ!

Wanna know what’s up?  Well I gots the book on my body.  I just touched it!   I got it for 20.99 at THE BARNES AND NOBLE ON 6th AVENUE!  But then again, it’s been on sale for over 24 hours.  So i think spoilers are due.  If you weren’t such a slow reader you wouldn’t be searching the net for SPOILERS like you are you lazy shit.  Just read a god damned book.

But….if you insist………:

Hermione dies in the first 10 pages.  Ron is so fucking depressed because they had already rubbed gennies and Harry feels his scar start to burn and his crotch burn too. He realized that whenever he frenched Ginnie Weasley, he would always wish he were making out with her brother (his best friend) Ron Weasley.

Soon Harry enters Ron’s bedroom at the Weasley home.  He puts in a Barry White CD and waves his wand and a red light enters the room.

“What you up to Harry?” Ron says through his sobs.

“Oh Ron. I feel so terrible about Hermione and I know you do too.  Can I get into bed with you?”

“OK” says Ron, who’d been crying dry tears since hermione had been raped and left for dead in the mortal realm and because it was summer vaycay, she was staying w/ her parents in the mortal realm. She was coming back (freshly fucked) from Ron’s house and all the sudden she was jumped by a bunch of Liverpool madmen.

“Let’s snuggle, ron”

they snuggle and harry reaches around his body to Ron’s junk and  to Harry’s surprise, Ron was already erect.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

Harry realized that his junk had been pressed into Ron.

Later Ron professes his attraction to Harry and how they only thing he and Hermione were ever able to get off to was talking about Him (harry), and the reason they’d always disappear post quittich match was to get their rocks off about harry.

but now Hermione was gone and Ron had felt he would never meet anyone who shared his love for harry. But this was better. Oh yes, this was MUCH better.

There’ll be more spoilers.  I’m only on page ten.

LOL SUCKAZ!!!!!